I broke a few of my dating rules tonight, and wound up regretting it.
Rule #1. For the first date, meet up for just a drink or coffee -- THEN if you hit it off and the urge strikes, MAYBE go for a bite from there. Why sit through an entire meal when you're just dying to dash out the back door? It's agony!
Rule #2. Try to have at least a half-hour phone conversation with the guy BEFORE agreeing to a date. It's been my experience that if I've had doubts about them over the phone, we never connect in person.
I was so impressed (via e-mail) by Super Foodie Guy's knowledge of food and travel that it seemed only fitting that we should meet at a cool foodie place. Because of our schedules, we only had a chance to talk on the phone briefly, and he seemed a bit too serious for me. Too late -- we had already agreed to meet, and it would have been awkward to back down.
I found out on the phone that he's not from the U.S. -- he's grown up in a few different countries. While I've been open in the past to dating guys from other countries (English, Irish, Brazilian, Israeli, South African, Australian, Peruvian) -- I've found from experience that I'm most likely to connect with American guys. Especially New Yorkers. Just the way it is.
Dinner was awkward -- I felt that he was a bit brusque with the waitstaff, despite his "worldliness". After we talked about our favorite travel and food spots, there were long lulls in the conversation. He asked if I wanted to go elsewhere for a drink or dessert -- I politely declined, stressing how tired I was. And that was that.
In other news: after 4 (or was it 5?) dates, I think I'm going to stop seeing This Guy. He's sweet, and we do have a good time together -- but I'm recognizing that we're very different people, and I just don't see us working out in the long run. I'm trying to be practical about my time -- as my mom would say, I'm not getting any younger! Rather than "just have fun" with him, I feel the need to focus my energies on someone with whom I could potentially envision a future.
On that note: two more dates this weekend -- Witty Banter (I'm especially looking forward to meeting him) and Younger Guy. Stay tuned!