Sunday, August 26, 2007

Weekend update / Sunday weigh-in

Had dates with both Sexy Dork and UN this weekend:

Sexy Dork: This was a first for me – I had to cut the date short because I wasn’t feeling well. We met for an outdoor concert, and planned to have dinner afterwards, but I was feeling so run down from a rough week at work, I had to call it a night before we even made it to dinner.

I also found myself a little less into him. I’m not sure if it was actually HIM, or a result of my feeling under the weather – I’d go out with him at least one more time to see.

He’s a really sweet guy – e-mailed me first thing the next morning to see how I was feeling. Also (I know this isn’t everything, but it helps) – he continues to be generous with the flattery. When we met up earlier in the night, he greeted me with an enthusiastic, “you look fantastic!”.

Then there was the date with UN. I think UN is more my “type” (looks-wise, as well as personality-wise) than Sexy Dork is… but I’m having trouble getting a read on him. My overall feeling is, he’s acting more like a buddy than a potential boyfriend. We have lots in common, always have something to talk about. But he’s just not as warm as Sexy Dork is… and not nearly as generous with the flattery. Come to think of it, I don’t think he’s ever paid me a single compliment. He's not a hand-holding kind of guy... but things have gotten quite heated during our alone time (no sex yet).

Cute Jewess had the perfect advice: “you’re not into him too much to stop you from searching other dudes, but you’re into him enough to see what happens”. So that’s the plan for now. I already have a date planned with a new guy later this week.

Speaking of CJ: I had a fabulous night out with her and her kick-ass friends – we danced up a storm! As she said – they truly rock.

Oh! Today was my first Sunday weigh-in for my new 10 in 10 plan: I was down 2 lbs! Started at 138 a few days ago… today was 136. Yeah, I know – your weight can fluctuate as much as 5 lbs in a given day, so I shouldn’t take this lower number as gospel. But if it motivates me to keep going? I’ll take it!

Sounded like there were a few other potential "10 in 10"-ers out there... how was everyone's weekend?


jgo said...

Hey LV - Sounds like you are doing the right thing with your guys. Give him one more chance to see whats up. What's one more date?

I was hoping you could offer up some advice which is related to this post. I am currently seeing a girl who is quite attractive yet I get the feeling she doesnt take so well to compliments on her appearance. I dont shower her in them... mostly I tell her she looks very nice one per date and tell her shes beautiful when we are making out. I think she has a bit of a low self esteem about this. Whats the best way to deal with this one LV?

Loverville said...

What do you mean, she doesn't take the compliments well? How does she react when you compliment her?

Maybe just come right out and ask her if it makes her uncomfortable when you compliment her... and let her know you're just saying what's on your mind. (maybe also add that you think she's smart, witty, etc, so she doesn't just think you're with her for her looks!)

Good luck! And you really should start your own blog from a guy's perspective... I know I'd read it!

jgo said...

Yeah i know im a blog hijacker. Sorry. Im considering starting my own but I sort of feel like maybe I dont have enough material plus Im concerned about the whole anonymous thing.

I guess the way she reacts is she gets sort of an uncomfortable look on her face. Sometimes she musters out a thanks. I feel like it's that she doesnt believe what shes hearing. It might be a self esteem issue.

I will try what you said and ask her if it makes her uncomfortable. Thanks for the help. Shes the first girl I have gone out with a few times and actually liked in a long while so Im trying desperately not to mess this up.

Cute Jewess said...

LV, we had so much fun! And you will be so on track with your 10 lbs, even tho I think you look great just as is!

Jgo, keep on complimenting her. She may not know how to react, but she probably likes hearing it.

As to the blog hijaking...You know I'm a fan of yours, but I dunno, it strikes me that it's not really fair to the blogger.

jgo said...

CJ - I agree with you. Ill try to stay on topic and Ill email you and LV if and when I start my own ;-)

Financial Artist said...

I'm with jgo on this one. I don't like to over-compliment. I think it waters down the meaning. I've been seeing someone who would not be considered a classic beauty; she has a more distinctive look. But I happen to be totally crazy for that look.

Anonymous said...

jgo, i don't see why you need to compliment her on her appearance. i always think it is dangerous in the early stages of dating to talk about "us." it is so hyper self-conscious. you should be busy talking about other things, not giving her your opinion of her. you can show your appreciation with your eyes, not your words.

plus, if this girl is very attractive, she might be used to guys liking her for her looks, in which case you come off as just another guy who likes her for her looks. and what if one day she gains weight or dresses down or gets a bad haircut? that just puts pressure on her to always look good.

i would not talk to her about whether or not she likes being complimented. that is beyond awkward. no reason to bring up a topic, at this early stage, that you can sense makes her uncomfortable.

it's clear by your actions that you like her. you don't need to verbalize it.

Loverville said...

re: what anonymous wrote... I can't speak for other women, but I spend at least an hour getting ready for a date: is the hair OK? Is my makeup just right? What to wear that's cute, but not over the top?

The least a guy could do is throw a "you look very nice" (if indeed he's thinking that).

Anonymous said...

I had a blind date once, (before internet dating, no pictures ,etc) and when I opened the door, he said "Wow, you are so much cuter than I expected." Ok, who knows what he expected but I liked hearing it. As the evening went on and he got to know me he tossed a few more compliments my way and I was happy. Come on, who does not like to hear that they look good?