Friday, September 28, 2007

You're a great guy, but...

Had another date with UN last night. The usual: nice enough conversation. But this was an eye-opener: we were kissing goodnight, and I realized that I felt NO physical attraction to him. (in the past it's been decent, but not exactly ragingly romantic) Not a good sign. Actually -- maybe this is a good sign. It makes it easier to realize that maybe we're just not meant to be.

Hm -- this may complicate things a bit: he invited me to a work function next week. I said yes, but I'm wondering if I should reconsider.

On impulse (maybe because I realized I had nothing to lose!), I brought up a "lite" version of the talk - and as I anticipated, it wasn't exactly relevatory. I told him that I've been having a nice time with him, and just wanted to get his take on things. He was like a deer in fricking headlights -- I could tell that this made him REALLY uncomfortable. He finally sputtered out that he hasn't really thought about "our future", but he's having a nice time, and thinks we've been doing the right thing in taking it slowly.

In case you’re wondering, why bother having this talk with him if I wasn’t sure how I was feeling? Well – if he seemed enthusiastic about me/us, that might have changed my mindset a bit, and I might have wanted to give him more of a chance. But as I suspected, that wasn’t the case.

So now that I've realized that I'm not really that into him, I've been wondering if I should end it now (probably), or keep him on the sidelines as I wait and see what (if) develops with Teen Crush. Hm, the latter option sounds a bit mean...? I mean, is it fair to UN to keep this going if I'm 98% sure I don't see anything there? As a friend commented earlier, I think I wasn't really that into him before, but I was trying to make it work because of all the "good on paper" stuff. He's a nice guy -- smart, considerate, well-traveled -- but there never really was that zing.

Teen Crush update. Now HERE was something different: we actually talked to each other on the phone in between dates. That's been a rarity for me of late. Not just a perfunctory call to plan the next date -- this was more of the "getting to know you / just enjoying talking to you" vibe. So far, I like what I'm seeing and hearing. Very much looking forward to the next date.

3 comments:

pt said...

Sorry to break the news, but I believe you already HAVE ended it with U.N.

Loverville said...

Oh PT, ever the optimist! ;-)

For once, I wish you were right. We'll just have to wait and see.

londongirl said...

don't waste time on UN. If you want to hedge your bets, find someone new!