Thursday, February 28, 2008


Slightly drunken, nay… tipsy… blog post.

WOW, is all I can say about my date with the FOF / Friend of a Friend tonight. An amount of closeness / intimacy / passion / hotness I did not sense AT ALL on our first date. (note: tonight was the date that had the potential to just be of a platonic nature). All this in a cozy wine bar.

There was an invitation (and yes, strong temptation) to spend the night at his place, with promises that we’d keep a level of chaste-ness. Oh man. So tempting. I was (mentally) about 90% there, in the mindset of WHY THE HELL NOT???

Then the other 10% won over, and I came home – alone. I think it was the idea that anticipation in itself can be incredibly sexy. And I didn’t want to be in the position tomorrow where I’d be wondering if I’d hear from him again, wondering if we’d done too much, too soon.

But oy – that feeling of wanting to be “in the moment” and wanting to roll with it? A very powerful one indeed.

Sober point of view to come next time.

UPDATE: he e-mailed the next morning to say he'd had a very nice time, and was I free to get together for dinner next week?

(somehow, I have a hard time imagining that he would have sent this same e-mail if we'd spent the night together)


a&v said...

Oooh! Sizzle! How exciting to be so pleasantly surprised. And how bold of you to restrain yourself so. ;) Anticipation is pretty damn fun, as you say. Plus, tons of relationship gurus swear by reining oneself in, so look at you all playing by the rules and stuff!

Samantha said...

Hot!!! Love it!

Trish Ryan said...

Gotta love it when your expectations are exceeded like that! And smart move following the 10%...extra anticipation is way better than the risk of regret, in my experience, at least. I suspect you'll hear from him soon :)

mimi of sexagenarian and the city said...

think you made the right choice, even tho i'm all for sex -- under certain circs. when SDF [the motown/groper guy] wanted to spend the night, i actually came up with an intelligent response on the spot [usually i think of the best response afterwards]:

"It's not the going to bed," I said, "it's the waking up."

i told him i didn't want to wake up and think, now whose back is that i'm looking at? who is this guy? what's his name? and why is he here? i was able to imagine the awkwardness and regrets of the morning -- the night before. and of course i remembered all the wisdom i'd read on the web: a man who really wants you will ask you out again. you don't need to sleep w. him right away...

gosh, for me that's a right wing opinion.
and oh yes, so happy you're having fun!

kelsea parker said...

Wow some control you got there girl.