Monday, June 2, 2008

Date #110: Great Smile

Can a first date still be considered successful even if it doesn’t end with a kiss?

Had a fun, chatty night with Great Smile this weekend – one silly, easy conversation after the next. We spent four hours together, and probably would have stayed out later and drank more, except that he was starting to get a sore throat, and was actually losing his voice. It didn’t help that the noise level in the bar gradually increased in volume, until we could barely hear each other – we had to leave and find a quieter place. Man, we’re old farts.

Later, had a bit of a lingering goodbye -- in other circumstances, there might have been a real kiss goodnight at that moment. But the combination of the harsh lights of the subway platform and the fact that he may be coming down with something put the kibosh on any romantic possibilities. So we had one of those awkward hug/kiss combos.

Will there be a second date? I hope so. I thought we had a good connection. He’s someone I’d like to get to know better. But as we all know, there’s no formula to this crapshoot known as “dating”.

There is *one* thing -- his Match profile showed one pic of him with a beard, and three very cute pics without the beard. In real life, he was bearded. I prefer a clean shave. So, if this continues, we'll find out just how often he grows the fuzz!

No other potential dates at the moment – I’m expecting a busy week at work this week, so it will be good to have that distraction for now.


Anonymous said...


Do NOT remain in a bar so noisy you cannot hear each other talk. High noise levels like that can damage your hearing over time. You are not old farts. You are prudent to remove yourself from that unhealthy situation.

Don't worry about the facial fuzz. If this turns into a relationship that means something, you can negotiate.

mimi of 'sexagenarian and the city' said...

sounds very promising.

in the meantime, you've defined an interesting and ambiguous gesture on the sex/love continuum, 'one of those awkward hug/ kiss combos.'

excellent point. good material here for sociologists of personal relationships.

Single Girl said...

I wouldn't worry about the no kiss on the first date thing - it doesn't necessarily mean things didn't go well. TDH waited until our fourth date to kiss me! So, you never know!! I would wait and see what kind of follow-up he does.

Anonymous said...

No kiss means you can focus on if you like him, and he likes you. It's simple. Hmmm, can kisses and sex muddy things?

Without that kiss, you can keep a clearer head and actually see if he's someone YOU might like for who he is.

Dating Trooper - Dating is Warfare said...

I'm with anonymous kiss on first date is the way it SHOULD be. When you think about it, touching lips (and possibly exchanging saliva) with someone who - a mere few hours ago- was a complete stranger, is a bit weird, right?

All you can ask for is a nice feeling and desire to see him again and want to know more.Sounds like that's what you got (and hopefully not a cold)!

dv in the 51st state said...

hey - am two months into the most promising relationship of my life, and there was no first date kiss...dv

marc said...

The first hug/kiss combo is almost always awkward. I once leaned in to give woman a kiss on the cheek at the end of a 1st date. She thought I was trying to kiss her on the lips and adjusted her head accordingly, and I wound up awkwardly kissing her nose.

jules said...

Yes, a first date can be perfect without a kiss. My now husband did not kiss me on our first date, yet I knew we would go out again.

I love your blog, of all the dating blogs I read (I am obsessed, I have no idea why)you have the best attitude and grasp on things, and seems to have the most real dates that turn into something (even if it does not last, you gave it a chance)

I just started a blog this week. I only hope I am as entertaining and fun to read as you! I do not know how to "blogroll" (is that the right term) someone. Once I figure it out, you will be the first.