Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Stood up -- harrumph!

So -- I was supposed to have a date tonight with Good on Paper (who was already a bit flaky about communication). I went to the appointed bar, just around the corner from my office. And wait. And wait. And ask a guy drinking alone, "(Good on Paper's name)?". Nope. And try calling him (get his voice mail). And text him. No response.

After a half-hour, I left him another message, saying I had no idea what happened, maybe we had some details mixed up, but I was leaving. Fifteen minutes after that, he texts me, apologizing -- he thought we were meeting TOMORROW, Thursday -- so sorry, he was in a meeting, just saw my message now, could he make it up to me?

I haven't written back yet. I checked our previous e-mails, when we made the plan -- I wrote to him yesterday, asking if we were still meeting for a drink tomorrow. He feasibly *could* have gotten that message today, and thought it was for tomorrow, Thursday.

Ugh! Still very annoyed. Maybe I'll text him back later.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

inexcusable!

a&v said...

First of all, what a pain! And secondly, I'm with anon. Event if it was an honest mistake, Good on Paper is suspiciously oblivious to detail.

a&v said...

(Heh, and so am I, what with the typo and all!)

*Juliette* said...

I say let him go. He's obviously a flake and if you email him it will just prolong the flakiness.

mimi of 'sexagenarian and the city' said...

chiming in to agree with everyone else: this would probably be typical of any kind of 'relationship' with him, even if you only had
2 - 3 dates. Tell him Forget It.

A fair fairy said...

argh! I know they are all probably right but you know, i think I would still be curious to see the guy once... maybe just to be sure I have no regrets later... but oh well... don't listen to me.

Anonymous said...

OK, I usually would not excuse the guy, but here is the question.. did you say "...are we still on for tomorrow, Wed?" , or "are we still on for tomorrow?" I have learned to always say the day/time for clarification, it is very possible he read it the next day. I would give him another chance. jess

Loverville said...

Jess -- I didn't specify the day (which is so unlike me!) -- so I could see how it would be an honest mistake.

I simply e-mailed (on Tues) -- still on for tomorrow? He replied Wed morning - sounds great. Seems he didn't get the e-mail til that day, and assumed it was for Thursday.

He was very apologetic, and said he felt terrible, and really wanted to make it up to me. We'll see. I might just give him another chance.

Lost said...

Ugh! I would totally be annoyed and would be very likely to say, "NEXT". However, if you don't hear from him and he isn't trying to make it up to you by being proactive to reschedule, then that's SO not cool.

Schmutti Weber said...

Let's give him the benefit of the doubt and assume it was an honest mistake. Here's my question: Did he call you after he got out of his meeting? Standing you up, however inadvertently, demands more by way of apology than a text message. If he called, I'd give him a chance; if not, I'd cut my losses.

Anonymous said...

The real question is whether you think you and this guy really have a shot at being significant in each other's lives, regardless of the time snafu. Did you speak to him on the phone and get a vibe from that? Chances are slim to none that he is "the one." But I don't think you should make a decision on the fact he screwed up the time. Make a decision on other factors.

As far as the time snafu, that could very well be an honest mistake. E-mail is impossible to understand. I have often thought I was clear as a bell in my writing, and the recipient had no idea what I was talking about.

Once, I showed up for a job interview on the wrong day. I swear it was their mistake, but they swore it was mine. Such mistakes happen.

Anonymous said...

I agree with those who say he must be proactive in rescheduling, and come up with a good offer. Eg, to take you out for dinner or to a cool bar. If he just lamely offers to reschedule in the same place, I'd write him off as a lame flake.

Anonymous said...

No, if he has been flaky via email before that, write him off. Why give him another opportunity to be ridiculous? You need someone to depend upon. he is clearly not that person.