Saturday, December 6, 2008

The course of a new relationship...

Still seeing a lot of Camper -- several times a week -- and sometimes it feels like too much, sometimes it feels just right. The course of true love (or in this case, early days of dating) never did run smooth, isn't that right? Just trying to keep a happy medium.

This has been a nice change from most other guys I've dated in the past few years: I never wonder if / when I'm going to hear from him again. I never have that feeling of, "maybe I should wait 24 hours before I write him back...". It's been pretty clear (from both sides) that we're both excited about this.

Last time, I wrote that New Guy was still on my mind -- thankfully, he's been making less and less of an appearance there these days. Here's the thing: it just happened that New Guy and I shared more interests than Camper and I do. In some ways, I felt (feel?) that NG and I were just more suited for each other... but of course, the big picture is: he's not emotionally available at this time (and who's to say he would ever be? And that he'd want to be with ME?).

[of course, it could also just be that curse of wanting the person you can't have -- arrgh, human nature sucks!]

I'm trying to come to grips with the fact that Camper and I have these different interests -- so far, it seems like we're both willing to embrace and learn about the other's differences, so as long as we can keep that going...? We DO have fabulous chemistry and have lots of fun together -- as long as that continues? Well, we'll see.

Sorry to have to be so vague! As always, fear of discovery, however unlikely, keeps me writing in this coy language.

Incidentally: New Guy and I had plans recently for a belated birthday drink (mine) -- however, a few days prior, I wrote to him to cancel. I was up front with him: I told him that if we're going to just be friends, I needed a bit more time and distance -- and it just didn't feel fair to Camper to have drinks with a recent ex.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Poco a poco, se va lejos...

In the several weeks since our first date, Camper and I have seen a LOT of each other. And it's only in this moment of reflection, trying to conjure up words for this blog post, that I'm realizing it's too much, too soon. He tells me often that he's crazy about me... and that he misses me when we're not together. I think we both need to allow for some distance, some mystery.

Saying that -- there have been those moments when I'm just thrilled to be walking down the street holding his hand. Just a few weeks ago, I looked upon those hand-holding couples with envy. Now, I'm suddenly one of them.

Yes, it's official -- we're a "couple". We determined rather early on that neither of us was dating anyone else. We've started to meet each other's friends. There are couple-y pics of us on Facebook... but I'm certainly NOT ready to declare us as being "in a relationship" on Facebook, for the world to see. Save that for a few months down the road.

And yet... I must admit, New Guy lurks in the back of my mind. To be continued...