Monday, June 8, 2009

Date #129: the Guru

This was my first "first date" in over two months, and I was a bit nervous. The Guru and I had nearly missed each other, like the proverbial two ships in the night: we'd had a few encouraging e-mails via Match, until he said he was getting off the site, and to write to him at his real email address.

I did -- no response. I was a little surprised, but not so much -- it's not unusual for a Great Connection Guy to go MIA on the internet.

About a week ago, I got an alert that he wrote to me again via Match (I couldn't read the content, as I was no longer a paying member). Again, I wrote to him at his e-mail address. Nothing.

I finally did a bit of detective work, and discovered that I'd misspelled his e-mail address. Once I realized this, I let him know, and he quickly wrote back, and a date was planned. I couldn't help but think that if we hit it off, what a great story that would be -- the romance that almost didn't happen, thwarted by technology!

However, that was not to be.

My request to talk on the phone prior to the date was met with "I'm not much of a phone person, but ok...". We wound up leaving messages for one another, and went into the date un-talked. Had I talked to him beforehand, I might not have had to write to this e-mail to a friend immediately after the date:

So... the date with (Mr Guru): for one, those pics on his profile are really old. Two: he suggested we meet for Thai food, but when he showed up (about 20 minutes late) he revealed that he was doing a cleanse - why bother meeting me for *dinner* then? I ate real food, while he got a bowl of broth. I had beer, he had hot water with lemon. Three: when the check came, I did the polite "can I contribute?" offer -- he said, "ok, we can split it, even though mine was less". Um... okay...

He was a bit too New Agey for me. He's not of this coast, and has only been living here a few months. The word "tantric" was bandied about. Interesting to talk to from a sociological stance, but no chemistry at all.


Onward!

*******
I recently stopped dating Martin because I felt it wasn't going anywhere, and I made a decision to actively seek a meaningful relationship. So why am I still dating Mr Easy, even though it doesn't feel like it has the makings of a great romance? Good question. It is easy, and we do have a good time. But is that enough? I think I need more time to figure it out.

9 comments:

midnite99 said...

A dinner date while "cleansing" - oy! At least it's a funny story, right? I really like the attitude you expressed in the last post, about deciding you want to be with a guy who's crazy about you and not someone who's just lukewarm. I came across an article recently that really spoke to me, and maybe you'll enjoy it, too: http://tinyurl.com/pr8fdk

Marc F. said...

"Ok, we can split it, even though mine was less." Even on my worst date, I'd never say that out loud. I'm a big believer in pre-date phone calls for this very reason. He would have undoubtedly said something equally as ridiculous on the phone and you would have been spared the experience.

Lost said...

Some guys are just weird. I've had practically each odd thing you mentioned on this "meet & greet" happen to me. I think the deal breaker is the "cleanse" and the word "tantric". Who does he think he is? Sting?

Loverville said...

Midnite: YES, I saw that, and it resonated with me as well -- thanks for the reminder!

Marc: it's normally my personal rule that I won't go on a date til I've spoken to the guy first. Live and learn!

Lost: indeed.

Dating Trooper said...

Well, at least he's good blog material!
My friend Mendoza had the same thing happen to her on a blind date! The guy made her pick the restaurant and then showed up saying he was doing a cleanse and couldn't eat. Nice move.

Dark Cloud Nine said...

oh bleh! wait... HE suggested dinner? I have a very perverted hypothesis... maybe he said he was doing a cleansing because he thought it would be a cheap date...

:p

Beth said...

oh my, that is yucky.

Anonymous said...

Seriously, if a guy were to ask me to dinner than be on a "cleanse" I would order a hamburger and fries, or something equally yummy and enjoy the hell out of it. What a loser. jess

online dating said...

Live and learn!