Saturday, March 19, 2011

A lot can happen in a week!

Last time, I mentioned that by our third date, the sexual tension with Jacques was building. We had a plan set for date #4 by the end of our third date, but it had to wait for two weeks, since we were both going to be out of town.

He kept up the fun, flirty emails while we were both away... and in hindsight, I realized they began to taper off towards the end. The planned SexyDate was on a Tuesday -- and I hadn't heard from him since Monday morning. Not exactly the actions of a guy who is excited to see a woman.

I should have just left it alone (as later discussed with my shrink) -- maybe I should have just NOT contacted him, to see if HE'd reach out to me at all. But I'm impatient, and finally emailed him at 4:30 Tuesday afternoon. He emailed back an hour later, and a plan was in place. Still, I was annoyed, and went to his place determined NOT to sleep with him.

Well -- the best laid plans often go astray, don't they? When I went to his place, the fun, interesting / interested guy was back. We chatted over wine on his couch for a good hour. We eventually started kissing. One thing led to another. I have to say - it was one of the hottest, most intense, slightly kinky nights I've ever had with a man.

I stayed over, and the next day, had to dash home to get ready for work. Jacques was leaving town again that day -- another ski trip, for another week. Sweet kiss goodbye. I told him that it had been quite an adventure -- he liked that.

And -- I haven't heard from him since, and I have a feeling he's out of the picture. I was a bit upset about this at first -- but simply need to use this as a learning experience. It WAS a hot night -- and safe. However, would I have changed anything? In this case, maybe not. As I wrote earlier, after months of not-very-inspired sex (or none at all) in my relationship with Jon Hamm, it was exciting to be turned on by someone.

However: the lesson I took away from this - the usual trust-your-gut. If a guy isn't making an effort to see me, and I have to initiate the plan? Fuck him. (ie, in the "forget him" meaning, not the sexual meaning!)

Austin Powers update: funnily enough, I almost didn't expect to hear from HIM after our intense little dalliance last weekend. Pleasant surprise -- he called, and asked about getting together. He could only get together Thursday night -- I already had dinner plans in place with gal pal A -- then he's going out of town for work next week. He asked me to get together the night after his return -- date set.

When Jon Hamm and I broke up, I revisited my separate email address that I only use for potential dates -- and discovered a four-month old email from The Professor. Prof and I had never actually met -- he lives in another city a few hours away, which doesn't help -- but we'd been emailing on and off for about two years.

Turns out he was going to be in NY this weekend. I already had plans for both nights with friends, but knew that on Friday night, my bestie D wouldn't be able to stay out late due to crazy early morning the next day. I asked Prof if he'd like to join us both for a drink, before D went home for the night. (note: date #183)

Who knew that it would be so much fun to have a date with both your best friend and a new guy? It just seemed to add an extra dose of fun and levity, which continued after D left. The freakishly warm evening meant the Prof and I could have a lovely stroll around the neighborhood, stopping to kiss once in a while. He's sweet and smart. Living a few hours away doesn't help, but he wants to move back to NY at some point. So, we'll see.

A few other blasts from the past may make an appearance in the near future -- stay tuned!


Anonymous said...

It seems like Jacques must have another woman.

Loverville said...

Anon: I think you're 100% spot on! I'm wondering if he hooked up with someone while on his first ski trip (around the time his emails to me started to taper off)... and maybe that inspired his next spontaneously-planned trip?

Totally makes sense.

Anonymous said...

Sounds unfortunate, if fun. Will you help a curious girl out and share some of the kinky details?

Lifebeginsat30ty said...

Totally right, give your energy to the ones who are excited to see YOU! Jacques is an a-hole for sleeping with you and then never contacting you again. You deserve better than that, no matter hot it was. The Professor sounds interesting. Back-burner man? ;)

Anonymous said...

I note that you said previously that Jacques was "in touch with his sexuality." Could that be the same thing as "is a player"?

Loverville said...

Anon on 3/19: I think it's best to leave to the imagination!

30ty: we may not have seen the last of Jacques... stand by...!

Anon on 3/21: let's just say that there are some guys who seem repressed about sex... and some who aren't. Jacques falls into the latter category.

Good updates to come soon!