Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Over.

Breakups suck.

After 14 months of dating, Sam and I broke up this past weekend after struggling for the past few months.   I don't have the energy or inclination to go into details, but put simply:  we're at very different places in our lives.   He's in the midst of a divorce, with 3 young kids, and knows for sure that he doesn't want to get married again.    I could go either way as far as marriage, but I DO know that I want to live with someone -- I'd really like someone to come home to.    And he's not sure when / if he can offer that.

There's so much more, but I'll leave it at that.     Terrible roller coaster at the moment:  one minute, I'm feeling relieved not to be feeling the frustration I've been carrying the past few months.    The next minute, I'm sobbing in my office with my back to the door, hoping no one comes in.

I feel no desire whatsoever to jump back on the online dating bandwagon just yet.   Need to give time time.


8 comments:

Rachelle said...

I'm so sorry, LV!

midnite99 said...

oh, so sorry to hear it! I actually popped over to your blog a week or two ago to see if I'd missed any updates. I'm sorry it ended so painfully. Give yourself time to grieve and get your groove back. One day at a time. Breakups do suck. {{{Hugs}}} from someone who's never met you but feels your pain and spent many, many years on that same journey.

d in the 51st state said...

really sorry to hear this LV, I have wondered (more) lately how you are doing, but had my head up my ass too much to ask. will be in touch on email soon, til then, big hugs and love as always, Dx

Eve said...

I'm so sorry to hear this. Please take care of yourself. Break ups suck. Sending hugs. - Eve

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry to hear that. It sounds gutting, very sad.

I know you will bounce back, as you are such a full of life person with so many friends, but I guess you'll need some grieving time first.

Lots of love, Rebecca in London xx

Anonymous said...

Love your post.
Just in the same place myself but in London.
It is unbelievably painful and sad so I can so sympathise with what you are going through - although my circumstances are different.
Feel like I have been punched several times - and even when feel up, I come crashing down again.
Are you still in contact or have you split completely ?

Anonymous said...

Hang in there! So glad you are updating though! I've been worried about you! - Faithful Reader

Mike said...

Just from your description of the break-up, I realized the relationship you had was intense with feelings of love and companion ship. I am late to the game, but I wish you well and hope you found solace.